How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Cage
“When I own a boy, he’s kept in chastity,” she said. “My boy – my cock – and I control what’s mine.”
V made this statement after our talks became serious. It got my attention and inspired questions and a conversation about chastity. Her views on chastity and a myriad of other lifestyle-related issues were essential for me to be clear on prior to her actually collaring me. But chastity and V’s motivation for keeping a boy caged on a day-to-day basis was something which took me a while to get my head around.
Before meeting V, chastity wasn’t really on my radar as it didn’t appeal to me or my previous dominants. And although my eagerness to please my Domme often causes shifts in what I prefer, experiencing one this significant is damn rare.
In fact, considering the way I viewed chastity and how it functions in a lifestyle dynamic, the shift was nothing short of radical. How radical? Damn close to a 180 degrees as I went from puzzled disdain to getting turned on at thought of V locking me in a cage on a daily basis.
Until fairly recently, I associated male chastity, primarily, with cuckolding and key holders, neither of which are my cuppa. Of course, that doesn’t mean this ‘primary’ association with cuckolding was correct, it just was. But male chastity has seen a fairly recent surge in popularity to become a more common practice in lifestyle D/s than it was twenty years ago.
In the mid-nineties, I remember seeing a lot more personals for local and remote key holders than ever before. From the outside looking in, key holding appeared to be it’s own sexual subculture that had a passing association with lifestyle BDSM as I knew it. But, of course, when more control is accessible, Dommes take notice. And while I’m no expert on the subject, I have to think one of the main reasons male chastity devices surged in popularity had little to with a cultural shift in D/s and a lot more to do with simple economics.
I don’t think it’s coincidental that the surge of interest in male chastity coincided with A.L. Enterprises storming the market with their CB Line of plastic cages. That is to say, the interest was there all along, but prior to the mass production of less-pricey cages and the internet making so much
porn & personals information available, a lot fewer people knew chastity was an option. Many of those who did couldn’t afford it.
A simple Formula: let the X-coordinate be the ubiquity of plastic cock cages, and then let the Y-coordinate be the amount of kinky people reached by the internet. The point where this ordered pair converge will equal the exponential (and profitable) explosion in pent-up demand.
Anyway, regardless of whether or not you agree with my half-ass speculation, you can understand where I thought the conversation was headed when being caged came up. Needless to say, I wasn’t enthusiastic the first time V mentioned chastity devices and don’t remember discussing them further in casual conversation. However, as soon as things began to get serious, I was the one asking about her position on the subject.
That’s when she told me the point was not negotiable.
As V patiently answered my questions, I began to get a clearer picture what her primary drive in keeping a boy locked down is and is not. Her primary desire is not long-term denial, perpetual frustration, or to make sure her boy isn’t jerking off without permission. Sure, some of those purposes might end up being incorporated in a single session or several, but none are the primary reason she expects a boy caged. Instead, V uses chastity as a means of increasing the total amount of control she has.
Control is the cake, everything else is icing.
The more we talked, the more I came to understand what V was into and just how many interests, fantasies, and obsessions we shared. As we started getting into more detail, I began understand chastity as a means of enhancing the heavier dynamics I crave. It was all still theoretical, and I remained somewhat skeptical, but I could at least imagine how chastity might be different than I imagined.
Then V collared me. Since then, I’ve experienced what it’s like to be under her thumb and just how hard and how thoroughly she wants to use me. The time I actually spent with V did a lot more than change my views on being caged. In fact, once I got a up-close and personal taste of what V’s intensity and dominant energy feels like, any nagging doubts I had about feeling neglected, undervalued, or underused were gone. In fact, the better I get to know V and her appetites, the more I find myself hoping she’ll go easy!
As for chastity?
No idea how it would go under anyone else, but remaining locked down for V is fucking hot. Wearing a cage is simply one more link in the chain around my neck signifying I’m owned, and it’s one I wear proudly.