Author: Polthus

18+ NSFW (Not Safe for Work) -- I write about BDSM, Female Led Relationships, D/s dynamics, sex, submission, and related topics. You can expect to find smut, rants, and fantasies, along with some introspective moments regarding my experiences as a male submissive.


A few weeks ago, I went to an event that was billed as being a space, “exclusive to Female Dominants and those submissive to them.” This event failed to live up to what was listed on the tin, but that wasn’t really a surprise. What was surprising was that my jaded ass came away with some ideas to contemplate.

Specifically, there was one moment I found striking.

A girl was being beaten in the next room. I did not go to watch this session. I just listened.

Honestly, I’ve heard seen scenes like this enough times that I could probably guess with decent accuracy what was being used on her her by sound alone.

The wailing turned to sobs and it was clearly cathartic, and I got some satisfaction listening to her take it. Especially because she’d been such a brat earlier, the sadism of the tops working on her was gratifying. (Yes, yes, I know that’s what she wanted, but whatever – people can play whatever game they please)

Anyway – at some point I interacted with the girl who was being beaten and remember her claiming to be “transparent when she bottoms.”


Overthinking Pleasure and Pain

A former Domme once confessed she felt both guilty and aroused when she hurt me. It was early in our relationship, and her sadistic desires left her deeply conflicted. Before, during, and after sex, she’d shift between pangs of guilt and jolts of lust. Lucky for me, lust won out.

About six months later, I’d notice how she flexed her fingers while pacing a bit to hold some of her more destructive urges in check. Where she was once torn, those feelings of guilt were  ‘mostly’ gone. Hell, at that point, the mere idea of using me hard made her wet to the knees. (more…)

Mostly Harmless

I’ve met and befriended a Fledgling Domme local to me. Since moving, this is the first local D type I’ve engaged with.

She’s a nerdy, Type A, professional gal, who’s delightfully neurotic and wonderfully naive about all things BDSM. I enjoy hanging out with her. Mostly because we have zero chemistry outside the ‘friend zone.’

I met her a few weeks ago for lunch and today for a quick after-work bite.

She asked if I would attend a munch or event with her.

“That’s not a good idea.”