The more experience I gain with lifestyle BDSM, the more I crave it. The obsession, the lust, the intensity, the intimacy, the complicated and conflicted feelings: I want it all.
But the majority of those who engage in BDSM identify as ‘bedroom only.’ Given common perceptions and misconceptions as to how D/s relationships work, many people feel a lifestyle dynamic is just ‘too much.’ And that’s fine. I’ll not presume to prescribe actions for other people’s happiness. That said, I’ve found restricting D/s dynamics to the bedroom means cheating myself out of the most intense emotions and sensations. Those can only be experienced by living within the strictures of the dynamic on a day-to-day basis.
One major difference between ‘bedroom’ and ‘lifestyle’ BDSM is the level of vulnerability. (more…)